I really enjoyed being able to get out on the trail twice this weekend. It really helped clear my head and put me in such a happy place. I’ve always been a very independent person, and being an Aries as well, I very much value my time alone. It got me thinking about the hardship of this relationship I just came out of.
I thought the man I started dating would end up becoming my husband someday. He seemed to be the missing puzzle piece that fit my edges perfectly. However, we moved really fast and thing didn’t end up working out. Even though we meshed perfectly with our interests, our views on what a relationship should be were almost exact opposite. I didn’t like the feeling that I had to make sure it was okay to go ride and double check with him if we had already made plans. I felt like my rides and barn chores had to be rushed. My thoughts were that I needed time to be with my horse and pursue my career and interests, while he felt my time needed to be spent with him.
I began wondering on my trail ride if maybe I’m not ready for a serious relationship with anyone right now but myself. I am only 25, and even though everyone around me is getting married and having babies I guess I’m really not ready. Right now, I am eager to hit the trail and ride every opportunity I have now that the days are getting longer. I want to spend at least one weekend a month at a competitive ride. It’s not even just riding, but I plan to start my Masters soon as well. How am I going to have time for anyone other than myself right now? I used to view my independent lifestyle as lonely and sad, but now I’m seeing it as an opportunity for freedom before I commit to someone. I have a feeling I will meet someone now when I am not wanting anything haha! I’m really enjoying where I’m at and what I’m doing right now. I gave myself one day to be angry and upset, but after that it’s time to put on my big girl pants and move on, so I did.
Here are some photos of my ride today. We did 5.17 miles in 1 hour and 17 minutes. We did a total ascent to 940′. The ride I did is mostly terrain so I’d say about 3/4’s of the ride I’m walking up or down a hill.